Comments for A Radical Sabbatical

Comment on I THINK, BECAUSE I DO………………. by Michele

Michele — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 15:11:30 +0000

You are right to focus on how fortunate you are, and I hope your daughter’s wedding in June will be a wonderful celebration of welcoming another to share in the life you have with your family. I know you won’t be able to avoid missing those (your mother and father) who cannot be there physically, but I hope you do not let that fact take anything away from the day. I hope you let the memory of them be enough.

Here’s where you are lucky… You will miss your parents terribly when the wedding comes in June.

Holding our baggage up against another’s does make us content to bear our own, but also when we look at what we had that other’s might not have had, it can make us thankful for the anguish of missing someone terribly, and so I share this for perspective only… I never knew, met, or laid eyes on my father, all I have of him are empty stories and DNA. At a relatively early age, my mother began a slow check-out of having any real presence or positive impact in my life, so that by the time she passed away, at age 82, there wasn’t much to miss. A day spent with a mother on this earth, and one lived with her in the grave, are virtually the same. That fact makes me feel as if I am at fault, and really I’m not. Sigh…

My children will marry, and though I will probably think of my mother in passing (I wore her cameos to my nephew’s wedding last month as a way to honor her) on their wedding days, I won’t miss her, or my father terribly, because neither of them added much to my life when they were alive.

Be thankful that you will miss your parents terribly, and then celebrate, again, all that you have… a roof over your head, a husband you love, children who are thriving, and the fact you are cutting it!

Comment on Feeling radically pooped! by Matthew C. Krian

Matthew C. Krian — Mon, 15 Feb 2010 00:18:41 +0000

Heyy, Found your blog on Google and I am so glad I did! Keep it up! =)

Comment on Soy estudiante! by Adam

Adam — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 15:14:56 +0000

Hi!. Thanks for the info. I’ve been digging around for info, but there is so much out there. Yahoo lead me here - good for you i suppose! Keep up the great information. I will be coming back over here in a few days to see if there is any more info.

Comment on Aging and drama by Hearing Aids American Fork

Hearing Aids American Fork — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 07:29:41 +0000

Now Im thinking of how my parents will be after 6years, how we should care for them and whom they can live with.I should be ready by then or else none will realize that.One thing’s for sure, no matter what happens we all love our parents and so we will find the best way to care for them as they grow old.

Comment on Silence never sounded so good! by Hearing Aids American Fork

Hearing Aids American Fork — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 07:12:43 +0000

You have touched me in a way. You’ve shared your story vividly and strongly dealt with it. Like you, silence never sounded so good to me.

Comment on Seasons change by John S.

John S. — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 17:21:25 +0000

This is a great site, I’d be interested in trading links if you would be. I have a similar blog in this niche.

Comment on Death and Dying by sydney

sydney — Mon, 25 May 2009 02:54:41 +0000

I loved this post. It was so interesting. I will come back for sure. Im gonna bookmark it. thanks

Comment on Death and Dying by akljp

akljp — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 12:11:33 +0000

Wow! I am happy I found this page. My mother has suffered from Congestive Heart Failure for years and suffered a really bad stroke 3 months ago that left her with very little speech and swallowing. She refused the feeding tube over 10 times after my siblings and I begged her to get it. Now, she continues to dehydrate and deteriorate with bed sores and loosing over 50 pounds which have kept my family taking her back in forth to the hospital. It’s just heartbreaking for all of us, but especially myself. My mother is on Morphine now and Hospice has taken over.
My husband is a Marine and we have always been stationed 17 hours or more from my home town. Finally, we get stationed 12 hours from home and so happy about our kids getting to see and spend more time with their grandparents. Now, this happens and it’s just so hard. I find myself crying all the time and feeling so guilty because I can’t be there around the clock to help my sisters and brothers care for her. They get into arguments with one another about who is not doing their part to help, but then they apologized and work together for a while. I think it’s just a combination of hurt and anger toward what’s happening to our mother. It’s one of the hardest things I have gone through since loosing my grandmother two years ago and felt the same way about not being there to spend more time with her. Sometimes I feel as if I won’t live long because of so much heartache and stress. I have anxiety attacks and acid reflux. I have gone through three deployments to Iraq with my husband and it’s just too much sometimes, but I keep my faith in God for the most. I really have no one to talk to, so this has really helped me to get this off of my heart. I pray for all of you that you find peace and hopefully I will also.

Comment on Death and Dying by Penquin

Penquin — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 00:49:13 +0000

Dear Sad, my mom has been sick for many years but she lived with my dad in an apartment near my brother and I. They had two live in helpers for the past two years but prior to that, only my mom needed help and that was for the past seven years. My mother suffered with diabetes retinopathy (she was blind), could not ambulate and was always quiet due to the meds she was taken. Over the past seven years, she had been in and out of the hospital several times for pneumonia. When she had the stroke in January, she lasted ten days and then passed on.
You can’t help but feel scared, overwhelmed and sometimes, even guilty of wanting out of it. My father became my mothers caregiver for several years before he finally agreed to get help.
It’s not easy but I feel I did the best I could and made them as comfortable as possible. I have no regrets.

Comment on Death and Dying by Sad

Sad — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 22:35:52 +0000

It sure was a difficult ordeal you had to deal with the gradual deterioration of your mom and with the loss of your parents in a short time. I am now dealing with my own father who is on the decline so we are dealing with it day by day so it is a struggle for my mom to be a caregiver and to deal with daily matters. I find myself dealing with mortality. Scary… May I ask a question about your mom? How long did you have to deal with it? Thanks.