Archive for March, 2010

WOW! This past January was a year since my mom passed away and in two weeks, it will be a year since my dad passed away.  I still feel the tears when I think of them and have gone to the cemetary several times to speak to them.  But most of all, I went with my daughter several months ago to tell them that Sharon (my daughter) is engaged and that we will miss them terribly when the wedding comes this June.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD…………….

I’ve been to several shiva calls over the past year and yes, I’ve come to some sort of agreement or terms with the fact that I will die, eventually.  I consider myself extremely fortunate to have a roof over my head, a husband I love, children who have graduated college and that we are all working.  I feel lucky to be cutting it. 

Not to say that things don’t get rough sometimes.  But we have to put things in perspective.  Okay, so I can’t vacation whenever and wherever I want to or I can’t give my daughter the type of wedding she might be dreaming of.  However, we all have our health, our lives or ours.

My biggest problem these days are dealing with my hearing loss and my mental state, which is not always where I want it to be.  But everyone has baggage and I wouldn’t want someone else’s.  I miss my parents terribly.  I miss my father complaining, I miss my mothers silence.  I miss their presence.  I hope that when my time comes, I will have left positive things for my family to think of when thinking about me.  We only have one life or maybe two, I don’t know, but I don’t want to waste my life on jealousy, hatred or anger.